Saturday, July 13, 2013

If It's Not One Thing, It's Another

In my last post, I mentioned about the bleeding issues I've been having.  I called my regular doctor and she told me to come on in for my yearly exam in her office instead of going back to the OBGYN from heck. 

SHE had no problem doing a pap while I was bleeding, and even performed an endometrial biopsy at the same time.  I researched what that was, and was prepared for some serious pain.  The night before my appointment I ended up having killer cramps, so I popped some Aleve and hoped for the best.  I had been having serious cramps on and off with all of this bleeding, so I was hoping that the biopsy wouldn't hurt as badly as some women reported.

When I had the test done, there was some discomfort, but honestly, compared to the cramps I'd been having, it didn't hurt at all.  Of course there was bleeding, but since I was already bleeding heavily, I don't know how much could be attributed to the biopsy.  My doctor said it was one of the easiest she'd ever done because my cervix was open from the bleeding. 

My blood tests showed that I was anemic (what a shocker, huh?), and the biopsy came back clear--so no endometrial cancer.  But what was causing that mystery bleeding?  I had to have an ultrasound for that answer.  (And of course, there was all sorts of drama with that, as well---I swear that nothing ever happens the easy way for me)

The results:   I have a fairly large (large enough for surgery) fibroid tumor in my uterus and a suspicious cyst on my right ovary that they want to re-examine in six weeks.  Based on my own research, I'm fairly certain the tumor is a submucosal one, and my doctor told me that it is taking up 2/3 of my uterus.  Right now it is 1 1/2 inches by 1 inch, but since it's causing all of this bleeding, pain, and infertility, it needs to be surgically removed.

This means no FET until I get this taken care of.  And since I'm limited in my area as far as specialists go, I am at the mercy of THEIR scheduling...I'm still in specialist limbo, which as far as I'm concerned is a special level of purgatory here on earth that I'm hoping will result in a few extra jewels for my crown up in heaven. 

What I really need is another miracle.  Like the woman in the Bible story, I long to just touch the hem of Jesus' robe and be healed.  With my family history, leaving this tumor in place is not an option.  It will eventually lead to cancer---my aunt's oncologist told all of her female relatives this, so we've all been really proactive when it comes to gynecological issues.  I just need a miracle where a doctor will see me and perform the needed surgery ASAP.  I'm hoping that I can have the least invasive option, but if I have to wait for several months, the tumor could grow large enough that I might lose my uterus.  I don't want that, obviously, but I'll trade my chance at motherhood for a longer life with my family and husband. 

So, prayers would be appreciated.  I'm not even sure what to ask you to pray for, but God knows the best thing for me.  I guess just pray that I will be able to accept His will.

Wednesday, July 10, 2013

The Saga Continues

What I hadn't mentioned in earlier posts was this one teensy, tiny, almost so small that it was missed, blip on the radar (AS IF!). 

Actually, it's been a HUGE issue for me.  It has actually been an issue since the miscarriage, but has gotten so much worse in the last 12 months that I finally broke down and told my doctor that I couldn't deal with it anymore.

There is a story in the Bible about a woman with "an issue of blood" that she had dealt with for 12 years.  She approaches Jesus in a crowd and has the faith to believe that if she just touches the hem of his garment, she will be healed.  This was a BIG deal, because a woman with her problem, i.e. "bleeding", was considered unclean, and therefore, would avoid crowds where she could accidentally "contaminate" others.  Jesus, of course, immediately knew when she touched Him, and when she admitted she had touched His hem, He told her that her faith had healed her.  Then He said, "Go in peace and be freed from your suffering."  (Mark 5: 25-34)

Suffering.  That's the best way to describe it.  I believe that I've mentioned that monthly cycles are somewhat of a mystery for me, have been since I've had them.  It's a function of my PCOS that they can be between 4-8 weeks apart.  Usually.  Since my miscarriage, they have grown more erratic, and when I visited the specialist's office last year, I had some serious concerns about the fact that they were changing to 8-12 weeks with 2+ weeks of bleeding each time.  I was told by the nurse practitioner that (and I am totally not joking, exaggerating, or making this up), "Well, when you don't ovulate, that makes your cycles a little longer.  You get your period when an egg doesn't get fertilized (yes, she really said it!).  If your cycle lasts longer than 6 weeks, then you'll bleed more and more heavily."

  I mentioned the whole "clots" thing, and she just told me it was because I was too overweight.  I needed to lose 20 pounds, and that should restore my cycles, and then needed to lose 70 pounds before she'd let me begin using Clomid, but she was just *sure* that losing weight would make my problems disappear and my PCOS wouldn't interfere with my fertility.  "Well, you can't get pregnant if you don't ovulate, and your size is keeping you from ovulating." (yeah, she told me that, too)

Needless to say, I was. not. under. ANY. circumstances. going back to that office because they weren't going to let me see the actual OBGYN, but be stuck with THAT thing. 

However, since my kidney surgery, things had accelerated.  I started having shorter cycles, but I was bleeding for 3+ weeks.  I bled from December 15-January 5, then while I was working at losing that weight and walking/working out, I had about 4 weeks of feeling super.  Then, I started bleeding on February 10, and continued until April 22.  By bleeding, I mean BLEEEEEEEDDDDDDIIIIINNNNGGGG.  I was going through almost a regular-sized box of pads every two days.  Lots of clots, lots of gushes when I stood or got out of bed.  It was NOT pretty. 

 I was so relieved when it stopped.  I was planning on going back to my GP, Dr. Wonderful, for my annual exam as soon as school was out.  I went back to walking again, because I wasn't losing so much blood that I was turning anemic.  Then, on MOTHER'S DAY (of all days, right?), the flood came back.  It lasted until FATHER'S DAY (still ironic, huh?), then took a 3-day break before starting again.  I was about to start buying adult diapers to prevent embarrassing leaks in the car and in public.

Sooooooooooooooooooo, what's causing all of this?  Stay tuned for Part Two, tomorrow!